Ramblings From an Apathetic Adult Baby

From Justin Gawel: Eccentric Dirtbag

Tag Archives: nice

Where Does the Time Go: I’m Terribly Sorry

What’s the old expression, if ifs and sluts were candy and butts than every day would be Christmas? Teach a man to fish and he’ll go fishing instead of writing? Excuses are like buttholes: everyone has them because that’s how they poop?

 

Clearly, I’ve never been much for remembering exact words and phrases and, lately, I haven’t been much for writing them on here into ramblings about gravy troughs, freelance animal control adventures, or dinner party hijinx.  For my hiatus I do want to apologize; I gave no explanation for my unplanned, WordPress sabbatical and I hope that, despite my absence, you’ll continue to read my stuff going forward.

 

I thought I could make time for both, but over the last six weeks I was sucked down the rabbit hole of working on a novella.

 

Yes, at this point, I’ve finished the first draft of the short novel and have sent it out to a few friends to get notes so I can continue to make edits.  Anyways, I’ll be sure to keep everyone posted as it progresses and I’ll likely end up posting snippets or some random chapters of it on here to see what people on WordPress think. Overall, it’s not an especially long story, just under forty-thousand words; it would probably take the average person about two or three hours to read it, although for the average illiterate, feral wolf child it would probably take slightly longer.

 

Bottom line, I’ll be trying to get back in the swing of posting every week or two on here in the not-too-distant future and thank you guys for continuing to come around.

 

Wuv,

Justin

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Gee golly gosh, you beautiful readers always make me blush like I’m the nerd who took off his glasses only to reveal to everyone he’s the homecoming queen they’ve long been searching for.  Seriously though, you guys are amazing and I can’t thank you enough for reading.  You are all attractive sweethearts and will always have the rights of full citizenship in Adult-Baby Nation.

 

I love reading your comments; they are these charming, little nuggets of fun that I am always excited to read every week. WordPress is truly filled with incredibly talented and wonderfully delightful individuals who share a passion for writing and creating.  People on here thrive on the pleasure that comes with writing a personal anecdote, an interesting thought, or, in my case, disgusting stories and pun-laden erotica.

 

They say in Heaven love comes first, well, I think WordPress has made Heaven a place on Earth, or at least the Internet.

 

Anyways, I just wanted to say thanks to everyone who reads this and who comments on my stuff.  Further, I know I am terrible at responding to awards—it has been my curse since the days of soccer “participation” trophies.   However, and I know this is a Tracy Morgan-esque cop out, I would just like to plug all of the kind bloggers who have nominated me for such honors since my last one of these.

 

Mama’s Been Drinkin': A mostly travel blog that still finds time to rant about coffee addictions and berate Debbie Downers. Further, it turned me on to the notion that “get laid or find Jesus” could be the new the new “carpe diem.”

 

Jenny Mac: By the title, I originally assumed this was the elusive website where Jenny McCarthy shares her recipes for macaroni and cheese, but, actually, it’s a great blog full of sneak peaks of bits of her novels.

 

Musings&Rants: A site that appreciates the ridiculousness and hilarity that falls into all scopes of life.

 

IChalkIt: A couch-potato-turned-crossfitter who will be happy to discuss the finer points and contours of banana hammocks.  What more could you possibly want when it comes to fitness advice?

 

BinkyBecky: I couldn’t find a link to her stuff, but I assure you she is a sweetheart who loves David Sedaris: truly two of the best traits to have.

 

Fate’s Janitors: A site about yet another good book that I have yet to read.  It’s a book written by a psychotherapist who is trying to life the veil and expose the realities about what truly occurs at a mental health clinic—consider my interest piqued!

 

Honey, Did You See That?: A blog devoted to the adventure that is life and the adventure that is marriage.  Funny stuff and I can’t thank her enough for her constant support of my site.

 

Two Rights Trying to Make a Left: Incredibly sweet and uplifting blog that chronicles a married couple, who seem to be a perfect match, dealing with the complications resulting from the husband’s life threatening illness.

 

I Have No Opinion I’d Like to Share:  A refreshingly honest take on opinions about anything and everything in her life.  You don’t agree with her?  She doesn’t care.

 

Amaranthis Paradisus:  A cultured approach to the arts and philosophy with commentary on capital punishment and reasons why Interview with a Vampire is a great flick.

 

Whims: A mom who isn’t afraid to tell it like it or say the word fuck. The hilarity of family life is alive and well on this blog.

 

And That’s All She Wrote: Some seriously delicious food porn on this site.  It truly sparks my appetite, and the part of my libido that conditioned with appetizing dishes.

 

Write in the Wrong Way: Hilariously cynical posts from a mom who discloses the awkward moments in her life and what upsets her about them in funny ways.

 

This Typing Makes Me Look Busy:  She’s hilarious, she gives away mustache awards, and she’s self-deprecating in her humor—yes, she may be new at this, but she’s already great blogger.

 

That’s about it for now, my attempts at writing humorously will resume next Friday—I’ll give the muscles you use to cringe or vomit the week off.

 

Love,

Justin

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