Ramblings From an Apathetic Adult Baby

Mostly rambles, few brambles

I’m the Most Offended. So I Win.

I will post the loudest.


Look at the injustices happening, World. And look at what a respectful, understanding person I am—regardless of anyone’s gender, race, creed, you name it.


My open-mindedness needs proclamation.


Far-reaching ramifications are in here; I’m sure. I probably overhead something on NPR about that. Wait, maybe that was that article on The Atlantic that I bookmarked to read.


Scorn, blame, hyperbolic comparisons to fascism—social media will be bombarded to a digital pulp by evidence corroborating how not homophobic, how not sexist, and how not racist I probably am.


This entrenched, endemic double standard needs to stop. And it starts with me posting this misremembered and misinterpreted Gandhi quote.


I’ve always been staunchly opposed to maltreatment and human suffering. I know it’s “in” now, but I was posting this way before all these posers.


Your half-hearted support for this cause is cute. Subtle really.


Not to say that you’re not a good person, but maybe I’m just better at being a good person.


One might even say a better person.


Are you like me, and actually nearly sobbing? I didn’t think so.


That’s just how connected I feel to mankind’s spirit and this ingrained abuse that I hadn’t cared or known about until a week a ago when—while comparing our Apple Watches—my friend mentioned that I should be livid.


I am, after all, the paradigm of the anti-bigot. The poster child for socialized correctly.


I should be exponentially more famous than my following would indicate.


My indignation might need to be laid on even thicker, like frosting on a cruelty-free, interracial, same-sex wedding cake. Each sentence more and more saturated with inflated comparisons to slavery and George Orwell.


Game over. I’m the most not-prejudice and I have the social outrage to prove it.


No one on this Internet, or any other Internets, could ever accuse me of being exploitative or intolerant.


Really, that only got eight likes?





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10 responses to “I’m the Most Offended. So I Win.

  1. cat9984 March 7, 2016 at 7:40 pm

    I am truly humbled. 🙂

  2. Kim G April 15, 2018 at 11:59 am

    Between saving whales, protesting fascism, and dismantling the patriarchy, it’s amazing that you managed to find time to write this screed. But I’m sure it came at a high personal cost, maybe foregone sleep, or some other necessity. And as such, you are a shining example to us all.

    Thank you. I’m nearly bowed in reverence.


    Kim G
    Redding, CA
    Where the list of social injustices is so long that it’s hard to know where to start.

  3. Doug Jacquier February 16, 2020 at 12:36 pm

    I’d say you’ve captured the zeitgeist but that might be offensive this week.

  4. JamiG4 July 6, 2020 at 12:43 pm

    Thank you for this.

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