Ramblings From an Apathetic Adult Baby

A non-comprehensive collection

Tag Archives: Life

“Soldier of Fortune” Cookies

All magazines eventually evolve beyond being monthly mercenary publications and being named in contract killing lawsuits to only being able to be printed in fortune cookies. This is merely the circle of life:

 

~All things are difficult before they are neutralized~

 

~Nothing is so much to be feared as fear, and extradition~

 

~Big journeys begin with a single step and a down payment in bearer bonds~

 

~Don’t panic; that’s actually the right amount of blood~

 

~I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I start my new life as “Domingo Salazar”~

 

~Take time to enjoy sunsets, and stranglings~

 

~Be happy with the person you are—never let any war crimes tribunal tell you otherwise~

 

~One man’s civil unrest is another man’s holiday bonus~

 

~Inflicting blindness is always an appropriate substitute for camouflage~

 

~Love is like war: easy to begin and exceptionally profitable~

 

~May your aim always be true, deaf to their screams and indifferent to the engrossing sexual release which accompanies cold-blooded murder~

 

~The amateur asks “how much?” whereas the professional asks “how many?”~

 

~Every man has his price, as do some of the more volatile women and children~

 

~Your smile is the best way to confirm any kill~

Learn Chinese: Not Guilty, Wú zuì 无罪

 

 

 

 

 

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